Everything DOES Happen For A Reason
My story isn’t a long one. It’s not unique or special. It’s probably similar in nature to most people’s stories, but I will say this…I have never been more true to myself than I am right now.
Growing up I lived a different sort of life. My parents had gotten a divorce by the time I was 5 and shortly thereafter they both had new people in their lives that I had to learn and love. Every other weekend was spent traveling to see my father and holidays were usually an argument between where my brothers and I would spend it. I was very involved in sports and music. My mother and step father never missed a moment. My dad missed almost every single one. My mother loves unconditionally but my step father battled with depression and mood swings when I was young. Until he was medically treated he was verbally and emotionally abusive.
Despite my mother’s mind, heart, and soul, I remember comments she would make when we would be out in the world walking the dog or shopping; “ I don’t care what people do in their personal lives but they don’t have to flaunt it in public,” in reference to gay couples walking down the sidewalk holding hands. My biological father also felt the same way. The comments and behaviors towards humans always sat badly with me. I felt it was wrong to say things like that about people. Love is love. It was early on I had questions about myself and didn’t know where to go with it or who to talk to. I just kept living my life being who I thought was “normal” and who I thought my parents wanted me to be.
I had friends that I spent time with and I always tried to be social, but here’s the kicker…I always somewhat felt out of step. I always felt like the odd one out. I never truly felt like I fit in anywhere so I think I always tried to hard to do so. I always claimed to never care about what people thought because I am who I am. Deep down though…I cared. I cared so deeply that I battled with depression and addiction for over half of my high school life. I had been in and out of rehab attempts made by my mother. I had been kicked out of the house. I had struggled to be myself. I barely graduated and spent the coming years dating guys, but knowing I’m my heart I was never truly happy. For every boyfriend I ever had I felt like something was always missing, like it wasn’t complete. I had even gone as far as accepting that I would never get married because I never found anyone that I could fully love.
Life went on that way for years. The first girlfriend I had I told my mom almost right away. Her reaction wasn’t great. She instantly swelled up in tears and was worried I wouldn’t live a true and fulfilling life. Not long after I was single again and I never brought it up again. I went back to living life in a somewhat state of denial. I had faced some bad situations and even moved from my hometown for several years. Upon my return I had finally started to come to terms with who I was and was ready to be true to me. That is when my life started to change. I had a two different jobs before the job that truly changed my life. And this is where everything happens for a reason.
I applied for this operations/Human Resources position. When I was called for the interview this amazingly beautiful, funny, and just sweet girl was who interviewed with. The interview went great. I remember being so nervous around her. I was sweating in my dress clothes. After leaving the interview I couldn’t shake the feeling that more than anything I had ever felt I wanted to know this girl.
After being hired we began talking on a regular basis. Yes I know how bad that sounds from a professional standpoint, but I couldn’t help myself.
The situation did not come without it’s complications. We had challenges we were facing and hurdles we had to over come before we could truly be together. Between family heath issues, ex’s in the picture, and challenges preventing us from truly being together. It was a long couple of years. We both lost loved ones and experienced a lot of heartache.
After a while we eventually told my mom and my brothers. The reaction this time was different. My mom was over joyed I was happy and my brothers and my wife are close friends now. After my step father passed away we told my step mother and biologic father. We haven’t spoken since.
One day in July of 2017, privately in the witness of only a few people, we got married in our own backyard.
My wife is friends with both my brothers wives and is close with my mother. She is a part of our family in every way one can be. I’m sure she talks to all of them quite a bit more than I do.
Everything happens for a reason. We found each other when I think we both needed someone. She is my best friend, my wife and the love of my life. We share a beautiful home with our crazy pets. I am truly grateful for everything we’ve been through and grateful for her and the life we share.
Everything truly does happen for a reason.
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