I came out to my family and friends in July of 2017. Immediately, my father was dismissive and my mother told me she would never accept me. Almost 3 years later and not much has changed with my family. Although I have been on testosterone since 2017, had top surgery in 2019, and my features are now very masculine they still refuse to use my preferred name and pronouns. I feel like because of this, I have learned to distance myself from them. I have procrastinated submitting my request for my legal name change. Essentially, what is the point if no one is going to use it. I have struggled with increased depression and anxiety. My overall health has declined due to my weight gain. I feel like I am working towards being in the right body, but possibly losing my family in the process. I have always assumed this was going to happened but I never expected the emotional effect it was going to have on me. My sister refuses to tell my nieces and nephews about my transition even though we live together and that severely inhabits my ability to be “myself”. Luckily I have a supportive fiance, but she is also restricted when using my name and pronouns. At times I think my transition is a waste and I will never be able to be who I really want, but then I remember this is what I want. Other peoples views of me should not define my life and my choices.