Scared, alone, and afraid of being me

Scared, alone, and afraid of being me

When I was in kindergarten my parents decided to put me and my 2 sisters in a private school. I was bullied from kindergarten to 4th grade when I was finally pulled out of that school. At first it was just name calling then it got to everyone calling me worse and worse names. Soon after it was my 5th grade year I had changed to a public school. They were so much nicer than the other school. I felt wanted there.

Middle school came faster than anything else ever. By the time I was in 7th grade lots of rumors had gone around school about me. I lost most of my friends from it. I was starting to feel very alone. Like no one wanted me anymore. So I soon became depressed, sad, and soon it increased to suicidal. I would cry myself to sleep most nights. I felt so alone. One day I got called down to the office to see one of the social workers. They said “one of your classmates told us you might be trying to harm yourself.” After she said that I felt my whole world crushing around me.

I didn’t want my mom to find out. But after that my mom was more on my side than anyone. She just wanted me better, so by the time 8th grade came around I had made new friends, better friends. They had my back and caught me before I fell. They helped me pull myself together.

Now it’s freshman year of high school and I feel so much better about myself and my appearance. It’s like I should have never felt like that. Now I value personality more than looks. I created a group where I help other girls who feel useless or like their nothing. No one deserves to feel like that. I just hope I can change someone else’s life and be who they need me to be.

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