Why I am I me?!

Why I am I me?!

My story has some ups, downs, heartbreaks, and joys. I was born to two amazing parents in September of 1988, in a small town in South Dakota. As I grew up I had always felt different. Like I didn’t belong. From an early age, until about 2nd grade I was convinced that when I grew up I was going to be a boy. But society said that was “weird,” so I changed. I became “girly” like the rest of my friends and even my sisters. As I continued to grow, my friends started to giggle about boys, but I didn’t feel anything like that about boys. I thought some of the girls in my class were pretty. But how I could I tell anyone that?! My mom said her “girlfriends” were pretty. So I faked it.

In junior high my best friend got a boyfriend. It broke my heart. I thought for sure that would kill me. My freshman year of high school I started drinking, to escape myself. When I was drunk I could flirt with my female friends and it was okay because… well, I was drunk. When I came out as gay, many of my friends had already known that, “they could tell”. It was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I was free. But then in my early twenties my entire world was shattered. My dad took his own life, and I found him. I was daddy’s little girl. I didn’t know how to cope with any of it. I self medicated; alcohol, marijuana, cocaine, even prescription drugs. Anything that would help me escape from my own mind. In December of 2014 something inside me snapped. I got sober. I started dealing with my pain and anger. I still have a long ways to go. But that’s why I am me. I am human. I am beautifully broken. With a broken wing I will fly. ❤🧡💛💚💙💜

This story was shared by a beautiful human.