How a homophobic, judgemental, bigoted and racist church saved my life.

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First of all I want to tell you I’m adopted, a lesbian, Chinese, Mexican and British. I’m a survivor of molestation by a partners best friend and 3 of his friends and his cousin at a MAYB tournament. Basketball used to be my favorite sport. But, that quickly started to change because every summer we went on trips with these “friends” they even had the balls to do it in the back of my mother’s suburban while she was driving. I still went on to play in college and hated every minute of it, where my coach also tried to get on top of me one night. I quit that next day. I’ve had cervical cancer twice. Once when I was 21 and again when I was 23.

I began a great career as a corrections specialist at a maximum men’s prison and loved my job. One day I was walking the runs in segregation and got very dizzy. They put me on administrative leave and the day I came back I had been to the dr. That morning and found out I had 2 small brain tumors. I still have them but they are much smaller and much safer than before. 💪🏽🙌🏽

Now, how this horrible church and I hate to say that saved my life. I suffer from extreme anxiety, depression and PTSD. Since I came out, my relationship with my mother and father had never ever been good at all…I spent a couple Thanksgivings and Christmas’s by myself.

A couple from we’ll call it “the home church” went to a basketball game that is in the same.. Conference? As the “home church” and they wanted to go to church while they were gone for the weekend, so they found one and went. While they were there the female preacher happened to be asking HER congregation if they were OK with her marrying a lesbian couple and the entire congregation of course with exception of the two guests from the “home church” said of course because where they were at is basically a smaller San Diego. This couple went home and told the “home church” of the” blasphemy “that they had just sat through and they need to do something. My hometown this church went on a witch hunt to get her disordainded, banished from ever preaching in another church again, making sure that the happy lesbian couple’s marriage would not be recognized and they wouldn’t stop until they got what they wanted. They held meeting every single day.. Every single day.. For 2 months to come up with plans to destroy the woman who has an open mind and a same sex marriage that has nothing to do with their church other than they’re in the same conference.. Whoa call the police!! Anyways.. Sorry this is so long its so angering yet it made such a great impact on my life so stick with me.

My mom goes to this church. So she went to two of these meetings because they didn’t tell people what they were about. The first meeting my mom said she went home and just thought, cried and prayed. Then she decided to go the second meeting. She asked them if a gay person or couple were to come to worship here would they turn them away? Would God want us to turn anyone away from worshiping in God’s house? They completely dismissed her and told her that’s not what’s on the agenda.

She called me that night sobbing. Telling me how sorry she was for not accepting me for the way I was. How I was born. For adding to my stress, depression and anxiety. That she didnt know how hard it was for gay people just to be who they are every single day. She told me she was so proud of the woman I had become and all she wants is for me to be happy. AND… She accepts me for exactly who I am no matter what.

My dad also accepts me for who I am. He thinks it’s fun to check out girls with his daughter.

Everything happens for a reason and I try to find the good in every situation no matter what it is even in my bouts of depression.
Then again.. Im only human.