The Answer to Anything is LOVE!

Name: Jayden Altobelli
Pronouns: He/Him/They/Them
Instagram: OneDayWithJay

What do the words only human mean to you?

The words Only Human is a mindset to me. We at our essence are all connected because we are all essentially energy. We all have thoughts, feelings, emotions, opinions, beliefs, personalities, intentions, dreams, etc. Yet we often get so caught up in our own small self created monologs; forgetting to breath deeply, be aware of what’s within, be grateful, and present. We know how to project things like Love and Kindness…there are just so many of us who have chosen to let go of the connection with our highest self. Most decide to limit the capability of their minds by accepting rather than questioning and wanting the best benefits for the longevity of their lives. We as a species have push ourselves to the top of the ladder but we often neglect our responsibilities in return and take our planet for granted. The words Only Human reminds me that I am only a fraction of the whole and that it is important to be aware of how I live out my part.  Not only do we need to remind ourselves of this when it comes to how we treat each other but it should remind us to be aware of how we live for our planet and our futures.

What are you passionate about?

I will always have a passion for animals. I enjoy learning about their behaviors and caring for all the pets in my home. I also have a passion to understand how and why these many different varieties of amazing species are important to our planet and deserve our respect. Believe it or not animals play many important roles in how our environment survives and stays in tacked. Not only that but the love our pets give us should not be taken for granted.

The unconditional love that they have has taught me to view things in a different way and make more loving positive choices in my life. It is my dream to create a pet store or pet care service and a way to educate people on ways they can strengthen our connection with all animals and use the skills and knowledge I’ve gained over time to give back and build a business around what I love.

It is also my passion to spread loving kindness to anyone I cross paths with on my journey. I was bullied when I was younger as I’m sure many others have been as well but when I got older I had a line in the sand moment at a entrepreneur event I attended in 2016. During a self reflection exercise I realized all the thing I thought about myself I created and I could change them. We are born with only two fears…Falling and Loud noise all other “fears” are inherited from whoever we’ve had in our lives. This new understanding made me want to uncover all my limiting beliefs while sharing my journey in hope of helping someone so they may not go through life feeling out of alignment with who they truly are.

How old were you when you first knew that your gender didn’t align with your sexual assignment?

It wasn’t until recently that I learned how to completely understand the feelings and emotions I used to repeatedly experience growing up. I’ve dealt with anxiety and depression for a very long time… It’s not that I was unaware of these feelings, I would suppress them. Growing up I was always focused on how others felt about me instead of being focused on how I felt about myself. I was always trying to please other people based on what I thought they wanted from me instead of staying true to who I naturally was and developing myself. Most of the time I was shy and would let my parents or friends talk for me which often lead to false opinions but I was never courageous enough to speak up for myself. As far back as I can remember gender was very confusing to me. I was into a lot of thing that others would say were “for boys” but to me it was almost always just something I liked or wanted to see if I liked because it was cool or interesting. Like I was always seeking things so that I could maybe better understand what I actually enjoyed. It didn’t matter if it was pink or blue, girly, or boyish. In my mind I understood at a young age that I felt different about certain things than a lot of people around. The problem was back then I would listen to others opinions and do what I thought would make others happy or like me more and not do things to better myself. I felt very alone for many years. It wasn’t until I left home and had my own responsibilities that I began to realize not many actually care and everyone is focused on themselves.  I began to take a look at my life and realized I was chasing others ideas on how my life should be instead of living my dream. From that point on I made the choice to love myself first which allows me to actually be happy and now share the truth that this is what our lives are meant to be about.

Who has been a huge supporter of your identity evolution and how did they support you?

My partner Ciara who has been by my side since 2017! I feel blessed to have such a strong beautiful woman in my life. She constantly reminds me of how much I’m loved and that with the right mindset, intentions, and focus I can be the best version of myself. I am so proud of how far she has come on her journey and she inspires me more and more everyday. I am blessed to have her support on my journey and I am excited to wake up everyday with her as we create our empire together!

What obstacles have you faced as someone who identifies as trans?

My Family had a hard time understanding me when I came out to them, in fact they still do. Even though they try their best to respect me by using my preferred pronouns and name… I’ve come to understand that the comments and questions are not intended to offend me, it’s just their way of wanting to understand. Which is all I can ask for.

I didn’t look like my Mom and Dad so already a lot of people would go out of their way to point this out. My parents adopted me as when I was a baby, so growing up I faced many different experiences (good and bad) when it came to my identity.  The way my parents raised me skin color did not matter. I was taught to be respectful, kind, and not judge anyone for the way they look or where they come from but sometime I would feel like my differences were a bad thing. On top of that gender was always a topic that came up in conversation.

My parents were in their 60’s and retired when I was adopted and had lots of old school beliefs. They loved to try dressing me up as “girly” as possible although I hated it. I was a tomboy and loved to play outside and had a vivid imagination. I was also told that I should go to school, get my degree, get a good career so that I could get marry, have children, and live a successful life. It rocked their world when I came out and told them I was dating women and again a few year later when I told them about starting my transition!

Now, they still find it hard to accept how I identify but it gives me an opportunity to share who I’ve become and my story with others in the hope that it can make life better for someone else who maybe going through a similar experience.

What was a pivotal moment during your journey that you’d like to share?

I would have to say that selling everything my partner and I own, renting a 30 foot RV, and driving through 11 states in 6 days to move across the country was the most pivotal moment during my journey. The realization that no matter how many doubted they could ever do it. We came up with a plan and set out to achieve our goal of living on the West Coast. We faced many obstacles that tested our relationship and the commitment we made to never give up on our dream. It took a focused mindset and surrendering to things out of our control along with faith that the universe was leading us not against us. It’s very easy for us to get caught up in the stories we tell ourselves… but I can see how much growth we both received for our adventure and it has opened our eyes to the power our minds have over the reality we live. I feel blessed and grateful for the people we’ve met along the way and the lessons discovered from our experiences each day. I’m also grateful we are able to share our journey with the world on our socials. Our intention is to inspire others to go for things no matter how scary, uncomfortable, or crazy it may seem. There is never going to be the “Right Time”… the only way to know what truly excites you and make you genuinely happy is to get out of your comfort zone and try. At the end of the day your happiness is all that will make you feel fulfilled and complete.

What advice do you have for someone who might be questioning their gender or gender identity?

Learn ways to understanding where certain emotions or feeling about yourself maybe coming from. Take time to identify what things bout your body or identity you want to change and don’t ever feel like there is something wrong with you.  Go at your own pace there are many resources you can find easily to help. Everyone’s journey is going to be different and that’s okay. Do this for you! No one else!

What advice do you have for the general public about what they can do to support humans who identify as trans?

Realize that we are all infinite beings with the potential to change.  If the reality we live does not align with who we feel we are we can create something different if we chose to do so and that is our right as a human being. The truth is that we are all essentially made up of energy housed in a fleshy vessel here to have a unique but purpose driven experience. We all face struggles, challenges, and have to find our own meaning and what makes us happy. Therefore, it should not matter who you love, what clothes you where, what name or pronouns you want to be identified by, how you present yourself to the world, or what gender you were assigned at birth, etc. Respect and Love are free! Have an awareness of your impact on our world and the people sharing this experience. It’s no one else’s responsibility but your own.  Our daily actions and reactions how a major affect on many things! You don’t know what someone else maybe going through. A little can really go a long way!

What’s your favorite quote?

“This day, this month, this year are all temporary, just like tomorrow, next week, next month and the next year will be. Nothing stays the same, and that’s a truth that I want us all to embrace. The only difference is the mindset that we take forward with us. The only difference is that we couldn’t change yesterday but only learn from it, but we have the power to change our tomorrow. The only difference is that even if everything is temporary, we still have the ability to impact this temporarily magnificent world. The only difference is that we, as people, can still live forever; as memories, as lessons, as smudges in the back of other people’s best experiences, as lovers, carers, as friends. The only difference is that yesterday made us who we are today, but what we do today decides who we will be tomorrow. And that is POWERFUL.” – Ruby Dhal

What is your most-used emoji?

Thank you Hands 🙏🏾

Praise Hands 🙌🏾

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