The life I live

Growing up broken inside. A word and feeling I’ve never heard of or felt. With so much anger, grief, and insecurity inside that the feeling of love was numbed and undiscovered. Hit to the ground with so much force and speed. Tripped by their feet no strength left to rise. Asking myself why a grown adult would hurt an abandoned child? Feeling unloved was what angered her. Spending eight and an half years in a dark, violent orphanage made me wanna die but that would’ve been a huge mistake because my chance of getting a wonderful family would’ve been missed. I may have a family but I still have grief and anger. Not everything in my life is perfect. My ability to walk has been taken due to a devastating physical disability called Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. Day after day I beg and beg to walk but no luck comes my way.
My goal is to get back on my feet before I die. It’ll be a hard journey to follow, but if I don’t complete this goal, at least I die trying to make it happen. I often say to myself our time living isn’t gonna last forever so don’t fear death when we have the time to breathe. Life will always find a way to throw us down, but we people will always find a way to rise. Tears will shed. Lives will be lost. Hope will be lost. Through those hard moments it’ll turn into something beautiful.